but i was never whole
anthony and i decided to recite traditional vows during our wedding ceremony today. partially because we feel there is power and reverence in reciting the promises millions before us have proclaimed and partially because we don’t want to sound like cornballs.
but now i’m worried. maybe my mister doesn’t know all the ‘feels’ i feel.
how could he? he can’t possible understand how he saved me.
go ahead… roll your eyes… women don’t need saving… we can do it solo!
and i could have too. eventually i would have gotten here alone.
but i didn’t.
i was close. i did the damn thing. the dirty work. the soul searching.
but i was never whole.
anthony – in you i met my missing little piece.
not my other half.
not my best friend.
but a tiny section of my creepy soul.
the hole i could never fill with anything else.
and i tried like freakin hell.
i tried anything and everything. and it was all incredible. the people. the places. the unmentionable memories.
everyday i thank jesus for giving me the vision not to put my life on hold. i didn’t wait for you anthony. i went it solo. i truly lived before you came full speed, like a bull in a china shop, bulldozing your way into my life.
but truth be told… my most favorite moment of my entire existence wasn’t during a mission to cross an item off my list. it wasn’t during a holy pilgrimage or while jumping out of a plane.
my biggest, brightest, and most clear memory reel moment… the moment i go to when i feel empty… took place on the beach at the jersey shore three years ago. a few months into dating, during a silent, sunny second while drifting in and out of naps in the sand, i knew i would marry you. and now… in a few hours, i will.
a few years ago i penned my single girl vows to my single people friends. today i set down a new set of promises. this time to my husband.
my married girl vows to my husband.
anthony i vow…